Is it possible to find contentment in discontent? I don't mean to propose a paradox exactly, but I do mean something along those lines. For all intents and purposes, life at school has picked up where it left off. Classes move along, assignments are given and accomplished. Life such as it is flows contentedly. And yet I am unsettled. In class, reading through the material, talking immediately after class I am for the most part happy. And then I want to talk about it all with someone, one I know will see things with the same excitement and from a similar direction as I do and I am at a loss. I can't. It is quite simple really, and painfully miserable. So in attempts to distract myself I shift the mess around in my room, or flake out of other things and hide in a cafe, or wander around the market places of the internet looking for the things I've been meaning to buy all summer. I will tell you honestly that none of it works. I want something I cannot have. I want to be content in the midst of my discontentment.

So I will go and try another distraction, another thing to pour myself into for the time being and not think about the coming up short at the end. Because that is life...